Sometimes life just doesn’t turn out the way that we want it too. We can feel like we have sometimes failed, while other people seem to be doing greater better things than we are.
Believe it or not, everyone feels this way from time to time, it is completely normal.
While your feelings are valid you need to think about if this is a temporary feeling or if you feel that it has got so bad that you need to figure out how to start a new life.
Starting a new life does not mean that you need to move to a new country and get a whole new identity. You don’t need to take it that far unless of course, you feel that things really are that bad and cannot be fixed.
9 times out of 10 you can fix whatever has happened.
That might mean removing toxic people from your life, getting a new job, leaving your partner or getting a better handle on your financial situation.
No matter what the situation is you can start a new life with some simple steps.
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10 Things to consider when thinking about how to start your new life
1. What is the reasoning behind your decision?
Reason will always determine whether you will be successful at achieving something or not.
If for example, you want to learn how to start a new life because you just had a major argument with your boyfriend then starting a new life might not work for you because your reasoning is not really that deep. You could just be feeling angry in the moment.
If however, your job is making you miserable and you are not fulfilled to the point of depression then you have a very good reason for wanting to start over.
You will likely have much more motivation to keep at it because you don’t have any choice if you want to better yourself.
Once you understand why you want to start your new life you can then get a much better perspective as to what you need to do.
2. Look at the things that have gone wrong
Before you can fully begin your new journey you need to take a look at the things that have gone wrong for you.
In order to move forward, you have to access what has gone wrong in the past and make peace with it.
That does not mean that you have to be happy about it but it does mean that you have to accept what has already happened and that you can not change it only move forward.
I know this might seem really basic and you might feel that you don’t need to assess the past but you must.
If you don’t make peace with the past it will only come back to haunt you especially when you least expect it.
Accept and move on.
3. Think about the kind of change that you want to make
Start to consider the kind of change that you want to make.
Is it an internal change that needs to happen?
Do you need to learn to give yourself more credit for things?
Do you need to have more self-belief?
Do you need confidence?
Is your job the complete opposite of you?
There are lots of things to think about here. If you are serious about how to start a new life then you might need to make some really difficult decisions that will probably affect other people. So be prepared for that.
You need to be strong enough to be content in your decision to move on in life and leave certain things behind.
Related post: 8 Tips on how to be independent and strong
4. Consider your friendships
Friendships can either work to our success or to our detriment.
There are friendships that we have that will pull us up and help us keep our eye on the ball and there are friendships that tear us down.
Take a look at the type of friendships that you have currently, are they helping you in soaring to new heights or do they make you feel bad about yourself?
If they are not positive relationships then you need to let them go.
You should only invest time in the things that will help you to become better.
Friends that make us feel bad about ourselves are not good for us.
You should never feel bad for letting go of these types of people as they only seek you harm and not good.
5. Become content with your decision
Any decision that you make to start a new life you have to be content with.
Ultimately you will be responsible for your own decision as to how much of your life that you want to start again. No one can do that for you.
Before you start to make any serious changes to your life think them through very well and make sure you are happy with them.
6. Don’t compare yourself
Comparison is a killer of all things.
In order to start your new life, you must make yourself the main focus. That’s not to say that you will become a selfish person but it does mean that your attention will be on yourself and the things that you need to get done in your life.
You have to resist the temptation to look at other people to see what they are doing and compare yourself to that.
Comparision could be one of the things that caused you to feel that you are failing. Stop looking at other people.
No one has it all together, that’s just the truth. We are all trying to work out who we are, what matters most to us and how to achieve our dreams.
Regardless of what you think other people have achieved all is not always as it seems.
You can never fully know what that person has gone through to become who they are today or even what they are still going through up to this moment.
The only person that you should compare yourself to is the you of yesterday.
7. Forget about labels people have put on you
We all have labels pinned on us by other people. You don’t have to accept them if they harm you.
Some may say you have beauty but no brains or that you can’t cook or that you are a selfish person.
Choose what you want to believe about yourself.
If people think that you are selfish but you know that deep down you are not, then forget about it. If on the other hand lots of people say the same thing then maybe it’s something that you need to work on.
Some labels we need to work on and others have been birthed from the jealousy of other people.
The label that someone puts on you does not define you as a person.
In the past, some people thought that I was not a nice person and that I thought too highly of myself but it’s not true. I was just incredibly shy at a particular time in my life and that looked to some people that I was too proud.
It took me years to shake how I felt about that label.
8. Focus on your dreams
Make a list of all the things that you want to achieve. This list is what will keep you going throughout your journey.
Take your big goals and break them down into smaller more manageable ones that won’t seem as a scary.
Use this dream as a motivator to keep you going forward.
Sometimes we all need a bit of carrot on a stick to keep us moving.
When you take time to focus on the things that you love and that make you happy you won’t have time for anything negative.
It will help to develop you into the new you that you want to be.
9. Challenge yourself
Keep on challenging yourself every day to do better, be better.
It is never too late for you to change your life around.
Starting a new life does not mean that things will just miraculously change overnight you will have to work on it a little bit every day.
It is a continuous effort.
10. Be mindful
Never underestimate the power of mindfulness. Being mindful means that you are always thinking and considering things before moving forward.
When you wake up in the morning you make the choice to be happy. You chose to become confident.
You do not let things simply happen to you and deal with it.
Mindfulness is all about being aware of your circumstance and being present in the moment.
Final thoughts on how to start a new life
Starting a new life is something that can be done at any time no matter how old you are.
As long as you know your reasoning behind it and can be fully committed to the process you can do it.
Starting a new life should never be about another person it should always be about you and how you can make your life better for your own benefit.